Dear Guy at the Salon,
Thank you so much for spazzing out when you cut me in the vicinity of my eye with a sharp pair of scissors today. I’ll admit that I was disconcerted by sudden blinding pain and blood that immediately coursed into my vision, but your cries of, “Oh, I can’t stand the sight of blood!” and “I cut her, she’s bleeding, oh, I hope that I didn’t get her EYE!” calmed me right down. It’s nice to know that my petty fear of blindness could be assuaged by your hands fluttering to your chest as you assure me that head wounds tend to bleed a lot…although you thought this might be a bit excessive. Although I A) didn’t stop bleeding for 15 minutes and B) have a tendency to scar, I was comforted by the fact that you took a whole dollar off of my bill. That was swell.
(I posted this on the Shock Totem board, but not here. And all is well! In fact, since he so abruptly finished with my haircut, I am now sporting a rock&roll look that only adds to my street cred. I could claim to play bass in any band, and nobody would dare to second guess me. Bwa ha ha!)